{"id":234,"date":"2006-05-29T22:46:34","date_gmt":"2006-05-30T02:46:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/2006\/05\/29\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand\/"},"modified":"2022-10-24T18:59:57","modified_gmt":"2022-10-24T22:59:57","slug":"x-men-iii-the-last-stand","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand\/","title":{"rendered":"Brett Ratner’s X-Men III: The Last Stand is lost in a densely self-referential world"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

God help me, but I agree with Harry Knowles’ review<\/a>. Sometimes you need a fanboy to point out what’s wrong with a movie crafted for fanboys. He picked up on the absurdly sensitive Wolverine, the important Phoenix backstory cursorily related in hammy exposition, and the sudden and arbitrary shifts from day to night. But the worst crime of all is that the movie is actually boring<\/em>; a mere ninety minutes seemingly stretched to what felt like 2-plus hours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Also bothering me: why on earth was X-Men III: The Last Stand<\/em> such a massive hit? Not just the question of general quality, but also the fact that it’s set in a densely self-referential world comprehensible only to dorks that read the comics as kids (cough, cough), or at least to moviegoers who happen to remember the first two installments really well. Perhaps the answer is as simple as it being a holiday weekend with no real competition in theaters, but still, it must have been off-putting and mystifying to mere mortals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s tempting to blame the whole mess on jobbing director Brett Ratner, but if Bryan Singer had still been involved, would the script have been any different?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

God help me, but I agree with Harry Knowles’ review. Sometimes you need a fanboy to point out what’s wrong with a movie crafted for fanboys. He picked up on the absurdly sensitive Wolverine, the important Phoenix backstory cursorily related in hammy exposition, and the sudden and arbitrary shifts from day to night. But the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5021,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[22,2],"tags":[1312,384,293,1313,385,383,870,380],"class_list":["post-234","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-2-stars","category-movies","tag-brett-ratner","tag-comic-books","tag-comics","tag-harry-knowles","tag-marvel-comics","tag-mutant","tag-superhero","tag-x-men"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/05\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand-feature.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pa9lhB-3M","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1738,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/mutant-mayhem-x-men\/","url_meta":{"origin":234,"position":0},"title":"Mutant Mayhem: Bryan Singer’s X-Men","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"April 30, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Bryan Singer's X-Men surprised me twice, first in a theater in 2000 and then again on a recent rewatch, by being better than it had any right to be. I used to be a comics fan, and read most of Chris Claremont and John Romita Jr.'s lengthy run on The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "4 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"4 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/4-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2035,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-mutant-menagerie-x2-x-men-united-movie-review\/","url_meta":{"origin":234,"position":1},"title":"The Mutant Menagerie: X2: X-Men United","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"July 8, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"In retrospect, the first X-Men movie did an incredible job of managing the introduction of a wide array of characters to mass audiences likely unfamiliar with the decades' worth of continuity established in its comic book source material. But the sequel X2: X-Men United crowds the stage with too many\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "3 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"3 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/3-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"X2: X-Men United","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3476,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/xmen-origins-wolverine\/","url_meta":{"origin":234,"position":2},"title":"Rewind & Reboot: X-Men Origins: Wolverine","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"February 12, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Much of what's wrong with X-Men Origins: Wolverine can be traced right back to its confused conception, indeed beginning with its clumsy title. The ungainly prefix is clumsily bolted on solely for it to alphabetize adjacent to the three previous X-Men films on Walmart shelves, iTunes, Pay-Per-View, and torrent trackers.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "1 Star"","block_context":{"text":"1 Star","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/1-star\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"X-Men Origins: Wolverine","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/x-men-origins-wolverine.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/x-men-origins-wolverine.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/x-men-origins-wolverine.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/x-men-origins-wolverine.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/x-men-origins-wolverine.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5804,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/james-mangolds-the-wolverine-is-the-right-kind-of-serious\/","url_meta":{"origin":234,"position":3},"title":"James Mangold’s The Wolverine is the right kind of “serious”","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"August 8, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"I was very pleasantly surprised by James Mangold's The Wolverine. Everybody involved did the right thing by simply pretending that the appallingly awful X-Men Origins: Wolverine was never made. Marvel Comics continues their (mostly) winning streak, showing everyone how superhero movies should be done. Hopefully soon we will be rid\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "3 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"3 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/3-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Hugh Jackman in The Wolverine","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/wolverine-2013.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/wolverine-2013.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/wolverine-2013.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/wolverine-2013.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/wolverine-2013.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3357,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/g-i-joe\/","url_meta":{"origin":234,"position":4},"title":"Action Figures: G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"December 18, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"It's tempting to throw up one's hands in despair that the well of source material for movies has dropped this precipitously low, to the level of plastic action figures. To be fair, trash (escapist or just plain trashy trash) has existed since the very first days of the medium. But\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "2 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"2 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/2-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/g-i-joe-rise-of-cobra.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/g-i-joe-rise-of-cobra.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/g-i-joe-rise-of-cobra.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/g-i-joe-rise-of-cobra.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/12\/g-i-joe-rise-of-cobra.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5331,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/avengers-endgame-2019-movie-review\/","url_meta":{"origin":234,"position":5},"title":"No escape from the tyranny of continuity, in Avengers: Endgame","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"May 4, 2019","format":false,"excerpt":"There is no escape from the tyranny of continuity. Like daytime soaps, superhero comics exist in a quantum state of constant churn and perpetual stasis. Characters are introduced and die and un-die, relationships form and split and reform, villains are defeated and rally and are defeated again. Excelsior, and collect\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "3 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"3 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/3-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Avengers: Endgame","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/avengers-endgame.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/avengers-endgame.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/avengers-endgame.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/avengers-endgame.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/avengers-endgame.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=234"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7166,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234\/revisions\/7166"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5021"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=234"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=234"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=234"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}