{"id":332,"date":"2006-07-21T20:54:52","date_gmt":"2006-07-22T03:54:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/2006\/07\/21\/the-dork-report-for-july-21-2006\/"},"modified":"2023-04-07T15:28:03","modified_gmt":"2023-04-07T19:28:03","slug":"the-dork-report-for-july-21-2006","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-dork-report-for-july-21-2006\/","title":{"rendered":"The Dork Report for July 21, 2006"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>An astonishing case of a <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">feral child recovered in Ukraine<\/span> (no longer online: telegraph.co.uk\/arts\/main.jhtml?xml=\/arts\/2006\/07\/17\/ftdog17.xml) is the ultimate test of the nature vs. nurture issue: (spotted on <a href=\"https:\/\/boingboing.net\/2006\/07\/20\/feral-child-profiled.html\">Boing Boing<\/a>): &#8220;Experts agree that unless a child learns to speak by the age of five, the brain misses its window of opportunity to acquire language, a defining characteristic of being human.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">most craptacular lyrics<\/span> (no longer online: thephoenix.com\/article_ektid14634.aspx) of all time, with a strong showing by 70s prog groups on page 2. Nice! (guest submission from Andrea. A-N-D-R-E-A! Ding ding dang ding ding ding don ding don dang!)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Wikipedia is far broader than I had imagined&#8230; and I had imagined it pretty broad. There are whole entries for <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">bad prog rock<\/span> (no longer online) albums (hi, <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Tales_From_Topographic_Oceans\">Tales From Topographic Oceans<\/a>!) and even particular songs, including Genesis&#8217; &#8220;<a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Supper's_Ready\">Supper&#8217;s Ready<\/a>.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>New Line Cinema partners with Zenescope Entertainment to create <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">comic books based on <em>Final Destination<\/em><\/span> (no longer online: zenescope.com\/bookpages\/final01.htm) and <em><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">Se7en<\/span><\/em> (no longer online: zenescope.com\/images\/bookart\/se7engluttony.jpg). Watch the <em>Se7en<\/em> <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">comic book trailer<\/span> (no longer online: zenescope.com\/7trailer.wmv), with motion graphics type set in&#8230; dear god&#8230; <em>Arial<\/em>. (spotted on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.cbr.com\">Comic Book Resources<\/a>)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>McFarlane reveals the <a href=\"https:\/\/mcfarlane.com\/toys\/brands\/lost\/\"><em>Lost<\/em> action figures<\/a>. The <a href=\"https:\/\/mcfarlane.com\/toys\/shannon\/\">Shannon figure<\/a> is surprising and yet, not surprising at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>J.J. Abrams, creator of my <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">crack<\/span> (no longer online: lost-tv.com), <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">cashes in<\/span> (no longer online: eonline.com\/News\/Items\/0,1,19513,00.html).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This will not be interesting to anybody who&#8217;s never heard of Grant Morrison, but whoa, this is a <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">crazy weird pairing<\/span> if I ever heard of one. (no longer online: comicbookresources.com\/news\/newsitem.cgi?id=7900)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>An astonishing case of a feral child recovered in Ukraine (no longer online: telegraph.co.uk\/arts\/main.jhtml?xml=\/arts\/2006\/07\/17\/ftdog17.xml) is the ultimate test of the nature vs. nurture issue: (spotted on Boing Boing): &#8220;Experts agree that unless a child learns to speak by the age of five, the brain misses its window of opportunity to acquire language, a defining characteristic [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8340,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"single-mini","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-332","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dork-report"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pa9lhB-5m","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":221,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-dork-report-for-may-19-2006\/","url_meta":{"origin":332,"position":0},"title":"The Dork Report for May 19, 2006","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"May 19, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"A well-written rant about photorealistic videogames also holds true as to why Polar Express was one of the worst movies I've ever seen (yes, I'm still mad about that). (spotten on Kottke.org) Katamari Damacy embroidery & pillow on Boing Boing. Real-life Parrots on a Plane (no longer online: iamtv.tv\/snakesonaplane). (spotted\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Dork Report&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Dork Report","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/dork-report\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Dork Report","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":141,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/daily-dork-report-for-february-18-2006\/","url_meta":{"origin":332,"position":1},"title":"Daily Dork Report for February 18, 2006","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"February 18, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Robots in disguise (no longer online: techeblog.com\/wr-07-a-real-transformer)! It's true, it's all true! And fake, too. I swear my colleagues & I had nothing to do with this. In fact, none of us over here in New York had any idea what our LA counterparts had done until it hit the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Dork Report&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Dork Report","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/dork-report\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Dork Report","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":144,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/daily-dork-report-for-february-21-2006\/","url_meta":{"origin":332,"position":2},"title":"Daily Dork Report for February 21, 2006","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"February 21, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"I've just gotta say: Smoothicons. So smooth, so icon-y. You can do no better. Finally, an explanation (no longer online: wired.com\/news\/culture\/0,1284,68893,00.html) as to why my iPod seems to have a strange affection for Future Sound of London and \"Jessica\" by the Allman Brothers. The Best. Game. Ever. in its Lego\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Dork Report&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Dork Report","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/dork-report\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Dork Report","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":377,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-dork-report-for-august-18-2006\/","url_meta":{"origin":332,"position":3},"title":"The Dork Report for August 18, 2006","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"August 18, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Kitties bustin' a move (no longer online: b3ta.hnldesign.nl\/index.php?list=4) in the rekkid sto'. (passed around at work) A win for the ACLU! Confirming what every sensible person already knows, the government broke the law. Flash bites the hand that feeds it. Brilliant (and cathartic)! (spotted on Boing Boing) Too impatient for\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Dork Report&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Dork Report","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/dork-report\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Dork Report","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":155,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/daily-dork-report-for-march-7-2006\/","url_meta":{"origin":332,"position":4},"title":"The Dork Report for March 7, 2006","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"March 7, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Cheap therapy (no longer online: okcupid.com\/tests\/take): find out what's wrong with you but not how to fix it. Me? I'm an Outcast Genius (60% Nerd, 56% Geek, 69% Dork), an Observer (Enneagram type FIVE - BZ), but a pathetic 47% fuckable. Gorillaz to tour as 3D holograms (no longer online:\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Dork Report&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Dork Report","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/dork-report\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Dork Report","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":292,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-dork-report-for-june-20-2006\/","url_meta":{"origin":332,"position":5},"title":"The Dork Report for June 20, 2006","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"June 20, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Most. Pagan. Watch. Ever. (no longer online: thinkgeek.com\/gadgets\/watches\/7d2b\/) (spotted on Boing Boing) Nature upends the fairytale (no longer online: cnn.com\/2006\/WORLD\/americas\/06\/20\/oatmeal.bear.ap). (guest submission from Godless Killing Machine Andrea) Shopify is going to be huge. Set up a complete, functioning e-commerce site (that doesn\u2019t look like ass) for free? Worth 2-3% of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;The Dork Report&quot;","block_context":{"text":"The Dork Report","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/dork-report\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"The Dork Report","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/08\/dork-report.png?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/332","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=332"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/332\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8205,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/332\/revisions\/8205"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8340"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=332"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=332"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=332"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}