{"id":5828,"date":"2013-07-26T08:19:00","date_gmt":"2013-07-26T12:19:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/?p=5828"},"modified":"2022-10-25T09:06:07","modified_gmt":"2022-10-25T13:06:07","slug":"the-dreadful-jack-the-giant-slayer-is-soullessly-engineered-escapism","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-dreadful-jack-the-giant-slayer-is-soullessly-engineered-escapism\/","title":{"rendered":"The dreadful Jack the Giant Slayer is soullessly engineered escapism"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Director Bryan Singer<\/a>‘s Jack the Giant Slayer<\/em> is almost unbearably dreadful. It continues a recent trend in the fantasy genre: fairy tails used as raw material for soullessly engineered all-ages escapism. See also: Snow White and The Huntsman<\/em> and Tim Burton’s appalling Alice in Wonderland<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s hard to understand how Singer could demonstrate the ability to turn pulpy material into smart movies (a la The Usual Suspects<\/em> and X-Men<\/a><\/em>), and yet also be so tone deaf to turn out the misconceived Superman Returns<\/a><\/em>, and now this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Replete with enough gruesome yet bloodless violence to earn a PG-13 rating (thrill to the sight of crushed heads, arrows through tongues, etc., all without the annoying little consequences that go with murder). All of this is absurd, as otherwise the movie is too dumb and simplistic to appeal to anyone over 12.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Worst of all, Jack the Giant Slayer<\/em> is a pitiful waste of its vastly overqualified cast, including Ian McShane, Ewan McGregor, Stanly Tucci, Bill Nighy, and Eddie Marsan. Unfortunately and perhaps inevitably, whatever charisma these veterans are able to project through the CGI noise only reveals the two leads (Nicholas Hoult and Eleanor Tomlinson) as hopelessly outclassed, generic, bland, and boring.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Director Bryan Singer‘s Jack the Giant Slayer is almost unbearably dreadful. It continues a recent trend in the fantasy genre: fairy tails used as raw material for soullessly engineered all-ages escapism. See also: Snow White and The Huntsman and Tim Burton’s appalling Alice in Wonderland. It’s hard to understand how Singer could demonstrate the ability […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":5829,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[25,2],"tags":[1859,32,576,381,362,1988,1863,935,1987,728],"class_list":["post-5828","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-1-star","category-movies","tag-1859","tag-animation","tag-bill-nighy","tag-bryan-singer","tag-eddie-marsan","tag-eleanor-tomlinson","tag-ewan-mcgregor","tag-ian-mcshane","tag-nicholas-hoult","tag-stanley-tucci"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/jack-giant-slayer.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pa9lhB-1w0","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":303,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/superman-returns\/","url_meta":{"origin":5828,"position":0},"title":"A god walks among us in Bryan Singer’s Superman Returns","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"June 28, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"It's probably my own fault for buying into the hype, but Superman Returns left me cold. There's not a lot of drama implicit in the story of an omnipotent alien from another planet, and I just can't buy the \"god walks among us\" metaphors. Spider-Man is a real, troubled human\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "3 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"3 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/3-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Superman Returns","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/06\/superman-returns-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/06\/superman-returns-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/06\/superman-returns-feature.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/06\/superman-returns-feature.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/06\/superman-returns-feature.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1738,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/mutant-mayhem-x-men\/","url_meta":{"origin":5828,"position":1},"title":"Mutant Mayhem: Bryan Singer’s X-Men","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"April 30, 2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Bryan Singer's X-Men surprised me twice, first in a theater in 2000 and then again on a recent rewatch, by being better than it had any right to be. I used to be a comics fan, and read most of Chris Claremont and John Romita Jr.'s lengthy run on The\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "4 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"4 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/4-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/x-men-2000-feature.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":234,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand\/","url_meta":{"origin":5828,"position":2},"title":"Brett Ratner’s X-Men III: The Last Stand is lost in a densely self-referential world","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"May 29, 2006","format":false,"excerpt":"God help me, but I agree with Harry Knowles' review. Sometimes you need a fanboy to point out what's wrong with a movie crafted for fanboys. He picked up on the absurdly sensitive Wolverine, the important Phoenix backstory cursorily related in hammy exposition, and the sudden and arbitrary shifts from\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "2 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"2 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/2-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"X-Men III: The Last Stand","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/05\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/05\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand-feature.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/05\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand-feature.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/05\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand-feature.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2006\/05\/x-men-iii-the-last-stand-feature.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2035,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/the-mutant-menagerie-x2-x-men-united-movie-review\/","url_meta":{"origin":5828,"position":3},"title":"The Mutant Menagerie: X2: X-Men United","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"July 8, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"In retrospect, the first X-Men movie did an incredible job of managing the introduction of a wide array of characters to mass audiences likely unfamiliar with the decades' worth of continuity established in its comic book source material. But the sequel X2: X-Men United crowds the stage with too many\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "3 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"3 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/3-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"X2: X-Men United","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/07\/x-men-2-united.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":98,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/king-kong-1933\/","url_meta":{"origin":5828,"position":4},"title":"King Kong (1933)","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"December 13, 2005","format":false,"excerpt":"The original 1933 King Kong gets points for being so drenched with subtext you can swim in it. But whenever Kong isn't on screen it's dreadful.","rel":"","context":"In "3 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"3 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/3-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"King Kong","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2005\/12\/king-kong-1933.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2005\/12\/king-kong-1933.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2005\/12\/king-kong-1933.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2005\/12\/king-kong-1933.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2005\/12\/king-kong-1933.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2071,"url":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/a-man-alone-babylon-a-d\/","url_meta":{"origin":5828,"position":5},"title":"Vin Diesel is a Man Alone, in Babylon A.D.","author":"Chad Ossman","date":"December 12, 2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Vin Diesel has made something of a specialty in dystopian science fiction movies, possessed of astonishing visuals but horrifically bad scripts. I'm looking at you, Pitch Black and The Chronicles of Riddick) Does he seek these kinds of projects out, or has he been typecast as a weary but action-ready\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "2 Stars"","block_context":{"text":"2 Stars","link":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/category\/ratings\/2-stars\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/babylon-a-d.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/babylon-a-d.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/babylon-a-d.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/babylon-a-d.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/12\/babylon-a-d.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5828","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5828"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5828\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7329,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5828\/revisions\/7329"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5829"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5828"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5828"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/chadossman.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5828"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}